The most overlooked aspect of online dating is the first email on singles sites. The reason? Men don’t understand its true importance. They think they can just put together any old piece and women will respond. Or, they figure that regardless of how mediocre their email is, if they send an email to enough women, eventually they’ll get a response. This mentality is exactly what prevents some men from meeting anyone online.
You’re not the only one emailing a woman. Even the most unappealing women online have desperate guys after them. Imagine how many messages – per day – an attractive woman gets. Some gets DOZENS…maybe even more. I have a friend that told me she receives at least 15 everyday on both of the singles sites she uses. On one day, she received more than 50. So you have to realize that you’re dealing with some serious competition here. It’s hard enough to get a woman, but if you’re underestimating the importance of a singles dating first email, you can forget about ever going out on any dates.
The Components of a Successful First Email on Singles Sites That Entices a Response
There are many different ways to write a quality first email. Each email you send should have the following components…
- Subject line that catches her attention
- Creative introduction that hooks her into reading the body of the email
- A body that shows her you’re interesting and have paid attention to her profile
- Closing statement and/or question that gives her a solid reason to respond to your message
Without perfecting each step, she won’t reply. She’ll have no reason to. You need a strong subject line to convince her just to open the email. If the introduction doesn’t hook her, she’ll click “Back” instantly. If the body doesn’t prove you already know something about her (READ HER PROFILE!), she’ll assume you’re sending the same message to a billion other girls. And without a strong closing statement, she won’t know how to respond.
I’m going to show you some examples of subject lines and emails that have worked for me. But before I do that, I want to explain how you should write each section. For the subject line of a singles dating first email, be bold and witty. Make her curious about what the email is going to be about.
The introduction should be similar to the subject line. Even better, if you are creative enough to connect the introduction and the subject line, you’ll really hook her. The body should not be too long, nor should it be too short. Figure a few lines worth of content. Don’t talk much about yourself – maybe a little snippet is all. Spend most of the body commenting on some sort of interest or activity she mentioned in her profile. The closing statement should be short and direct. Give her a question she must answer. This will increase your chances of getting a reply.
Be the “Purple Cow”: First Singles Dating Message Examples that Stand Out
Walk through a room filled with a bunch of average looking guys of the same race and ethnicity. When you exit the room, there probably won’t be a single person you distinctly remember. Now, let’s say there was a giant purple cow in the middle of that room. I’ll bet that purple cow will be the only thing you think about after leaving the room. Writing an email to a woman online is similar. She receives tons of messages everyday and they all kind of look alike.
It gets to a point where some women don’t even bother opening 75% of the messages they receive. The ones they open are the “purple cows” of the bunch. The emails that stand out – but not in a bad way. The following examples worked well for me because they stood out in front of the competition, humored women, and met the criterion listed above…
3 Killer Subject Lines:
- “DO NOT READ THIS!”
- “DID YOU KNOW?”
- “I KNOW YOUR SECRET….Muahahaha!”
3 Singles Dating First Email Messages to Go With Them
- “I see you can’t follow directions! That’s okay, you can make it up to me by going out on a date with me. Don’t worry – I don’t bit (unless you want me to). I’m a really nice guy. A really, really nice guy. Yeah, I read your profile (I know, weird, hu?), and so I know you want a nice guy. I bet every guy tells you they’re nice and then you find out he’s a complete a-hole. Well, how’s about this…why don’t we go out for dinner (my treat) and I’ll prove to you I’m not like all the other guys?”
- “…that not all of us guys on here are perverts? I know for a fact that most of the emails women on here receive are from guys just looking for sex. I’m not going to lie – I love sex. We all do. But I’m here to actually find the woman I can fall asleep to for the next 50 years (unless I die prematurely, of course). I liked your profile. You seem very interesting (and, yes, pretty). I’m curious to know more about your obsession with World of Warcraft. Alright, you caught me, I’m a video game nerd too! Wanna play online sometime?”
- “Okay, that was a lie! I don’t know your secret. I just wanted you to open up this email. Or maybe I do know your secret? Yep, I do know it. I know I’m your dream man. How do I know this? Because I read your description in your profile of what you’re looking for in a man. Let’s see…handsome (check), into sports (check), faithful (check), caring (check), romantic (HELL YES!). We’re going to make some awesome babies and live happily ever after. Chat tonight?”